This article could be considered as a warning for women who are dating one guy for few years and feels to be madly in love with them and cannot imagine their life without them. But they tend to forget that the person you are at the age of 18, 20 or even 22 is not the same individual you will be in next couple of years. This argument is also valid for a 30 and 50 year old woman but the difference are the knowledge of core values and also about her emotional and intellectual needs are much more at this age. These are the two most important aspects of a woman’s personality and they will remain almost same through entire life. But if she has not figured out about these two major aspects at the time of her marriage then it is quite obvious that she will regret it sooner or later. She will not be able to confirm her roles as “wife” or “daughter in law” or “mother”.
Marrying at a young stage makes you lead a troubled life, not because you were not able to live your own life or did not had one night stand but rather because there is no identity if yourself other than being a wife. This does not mean you start being unfaithful to your husband but you can try out different soul searching things to identify yourself and still stay faithful to your husband.
If you too are feeling this way then the first thing you need to do is have a talk with your husband and explain him your feelings. Do not blame him for taking away your youth. However, your youth was never taken away; it was just spent in a different way. Tell him about your feelings of not having a child at this age, because you not ready to take up the responsibility. This would be unfair not only to you but to the child as well. The child you will have in future will be able to get parent who are ready for the responsibility and are capable enough to provide a loving and stable home. As none of the parent has these qualities, it is better to quit this idea of parenthood.
The next important thing you need to do is get a life. You can do this by joining hobby classes, hanging out with friends or some fun-activities. Find your interest and make sure they are not self-destructive or stupid; they should be able to provide you with an identity other than just being a wife. Instead of thinking of sleeping with some random guy, think of going for a vacation without your husband. You will find a lot of solo adventures and retreats designed especially for women travelling alone.
The third thing you need to do is take some spiritual guidance, which could be going to church, meditation, yoga or studying Buddhism. It is all about facing challenges and learning from your mistakes, like marrying too early but that needs to be converted into a learning experience than just a regret.
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