11 Ways to Gain Self Confidence!
“God helps those who help themselves.” We all have heard this quotation umpteen number of times but have we ever tried to analyze what it actually signifies? It emphasis the need to be confident because only a confident person has the guts to face adversities, risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight, or any other experience that reveals the human spirit.
Self confidence gives us the freedom to commit mistakes and cope with failure without making us feel worthless. If only we have confidence in ourselves, can we gain confidence of others. After all, most people are reluctant to back a project that’s being pitched by someone who is nervous, fumbling and overly apologetic. On the other hand, you might be persuaded by someone who spoke clearly, who held his or her head high, who answered questions assuredly, and who readily admitted when he/she did not know something.
So where do you rate yourself on the scale of 1-10 for your confidence level? Do you think you fall in the low confidence bracket? Here’s some good news for you. And the good news is that self-confidence can be learned and built on.
Let’s start the process of building self-confidence. Remember there is no quick fix solution for it. Nonetheless, practice makes a man perfect. So all you have to do is try and implement the following given tips in your day to day life.
- Recognize your insecurities: We all have insecurities in life. It can be anything from acne, to regrets, to friends at school. Giving a name to the things which make you feel unworthy, ashamed or inferior helps to combat them. You can try to pen down your thoughts and you will find that it makes you feel much lighter and happier. Remember that no one is perfect. The man or woman sitting next to you might have the same amount of insecurities as you have. If writing doesn’t come easily to you, you might want to talk it out with your friends or loved ones. Sharing your thoughts will help relieve the burden you have been carrying all alone.
- Identify your successes: No matter how insecure you might feel, God has blessed each one of us with some talent. Discover the things you are good at and then focus on improving them. Give yourself permission to take pride in your talents. Give yourself credit for your successes. Inferiority is a state of mind in which you’ve declared yourself a victim. Do not allow yourself to be victimized.
- Be thankful for what you have: A lot of the times, at the root of insecurity and lack of confidence is a feeling of not having enough of something, whether it’s emotional validation, good luck, money, etc. By acknowledging and appreciating what you do have, you can combat the feeling of being incomplete and unsatisfied. Finding that inner peace will do wonders for your confidence.
- Be positive: Avoid self-pity or sympathy of others. Never allow others to make you feel inferior–they can only do so if you let them. If you continue to loathe and belittle yourself, others are going to do and believe likewise. Instead, speak positively about yourself, about your future, and about your progress. Do not be afraid to project your strengths and qualities to others.
- Dress sharp: Although clothes don’t make the man, they certainly affect the way he feels about himself. When you don’t look good, you don’t feel good. It changes the way you carry yourself and interact with people. This doesn’t mean you need to spend a lot on clothes. Rather than buying a bunch of cheap clothes, buy half as many select, high quality items. In long run this decreases spending because expensive clothes wear out less easily and stay in style longer than cheap clothes.
- Walk faster: Your gait tells a lot about your personality. Is it slow? Tired? Painful? Or is it energetic and purposeful? People with confidence walk quickly. They have places to go, people to see, and important work to do. You can increase your self confidence by putting some pep in your step. Walking 25% faster will make to you look and feel more important.
- Compliment other people: When we think negatively about ourselves, we often project that feeling on to others in the form of insults and gossip. Refuse to engage in backstabbing gossip and make an effort to compliment those around you. In the process, you’ll become well liked and build self confidence. By looking for the best in others, you indirectly bring out the best in yourself.
- Take the front seat: Back benchers might seem to have a lot of fun in schools and colleges but that does nothing to boost their self confidence. Don’t be afraid to get noticed. By deciding to sit in the front row, you can get over your irrational fear of getting noticed and build your self confidence.
- Speak up: It’s a general observation that many people are afraid to speak or ask questions in a group discussion or a public gathering. They are afraid that they might be judged for saying something stupid. Generally, people are much more accepting than we imagine. In fact most people are dealing with the exact same fears. By making an effort to speak up at least once in every group discussion, you’ll become a better public speaker, more confident in your own thoughts, and recognized as a leader by your peers.
- Work out: A healthy mind resides in a healthy body. If you are fit, you are surrounded by positivity and energy. If you are out of shape you feel unattractive. This leads to demoralization. Just a little discipline in your life can help shape up your self confidence in a big way.
- Smile: Last but not the least; try to smile as much as possible. People are always appreciative of a smiling face. You will be welcomed by anyone who comes in your contact. A smiling face is always received with warmth and affection. Acceptance and recognition from others helps in building self confidence.
There is no verse in the Bible that says “God helps those who helps themselves”. In the first place, why should God help you already if you are managing it on your own? I think God helps those who are helpless and turn to Him for help. Not those proud people who can already help themselves.
I like many of these tips. Some of them work from the inside out and some from the outside in. I’ve never quite thought that walking a faster clip would give me self confidence but I suppose it would. Not only will I feel more energetic but I will look like I know what I’m doing and where I’m going. I will have respect of those around me which will add to my already growing confidence. Nice article. Thanks for posting these handy tips.
A few day’s back I got a mail from a friend of mine, the content was like this:
This is one of the best explanations of why God allows pain and suffering that I have seen…
A man went to a barbershop to have his hair cut and his beard trimmed.
As the barber began to work, they began to have a good conversation.
They talked about so many things and various subjects.
When they eventually touched on the subject of God, the barber said:
“I don’t believe that God exists.”
“Why do you say that?” asked the customer. “Well, you just have to go out in the street to realize that God doesn’t exist.
Tell me, if God exists, would there be so many sick people?
Would there be abandoned children?
If God existed, there would be neither suffering nor pain.
I can’t imagine a loving God who would allow all of these things.”
The customer thought for a moment, but didn’t respond because he didn’t want to start an argument.
The barber finished his job and the customer left the shop.
Just after he left the barbershop, he saw a man in the street with long, stringy, dirty hair and an untrimmed beard.
He looked dirty and unkempt. The customer turned back and entered the barber shop again and he said to the barber:
“You know what? Barbers do not exist.”
“How can you say that?” asked the surprised barber.
“I am here, and I am a barber. And I just worked on you!”
“No!” the customer exclaimed. “Barbers don’t exist because
if they did, there would be no people with dirty long hair and untrimmed beards, like that man outside.”
“Ah, but barbers DO exist! That’s what happens when people do not come to me.”
“Exactly!” affirmed the customer. “That’s the point! God, too, DOES exist!
That’s what happens when people do not go to Him and don’t look to Him for help.
That’s why there’s so much pain and suffering in the world.”
Confidence in oneself is the driving force behind becoming more than we could believe we could ever be. Once you are in tune with ourselves – the sky is not a limit at all!
The greatest power lies within. Only you have the power to make your life the way you want it to be. Everyone else is usually to busy with their own life. And remembering that you only have one life, why would you not want the best for yourself.
Self-confidence arises in a person when he knows that he is worthy for the entitled job. When he donot care for what others would feel. When he is knows actually what he is, and he do things in his OWN real way, and not copied from others style.
He should have faith in himself that God is always with him and he is on the right track.
Walk slowly, like you own the place. Walking quickly makes you look skittish and nervous.
Confident people most certainly DO NOT sprint about
I think there is a fine line between having confidence, and being kind of arrogant. The “walking faster to look like you have important things to do” part, is in my opinion just a way of raising your own self confidence by looking down on other people, who does not have these ‘important’ things to do (which you actually don’t have either).
I kinda laugh inside myself at these kind of people, who try to look important, when really, they aren’t (not to put them down, I just think it seems shallow).
I’m personally a quiet introverted person. I have confidence in myself, but I feel no need to especially get others to notice me, or speak up at every chance I get. I speak only when it is about something that interests me, or in arguments in which I feel a need to voice my opinion.
I agree with some of the suggestions, but a lot of them I think is kind of simple suggestions, which would just build ’empty’ confidence, where you don’t really have anything to be confident about.
Instead of using simple ‘tricks’, you could use your time on gaining knowledge about subjects that interest you, do a good job in school or at work.
For me, that naturally raises my self confidence since I feel like I can be proud of the effort I put in.
Overall I would say that being confident is about believing in your own abilities and just be yourself.
Sorry for the long rant.. :p
My Lord? I ask you for beneficial Knowledge, and i seek refuge from non-beneficial knowledge.”
Islamic Bouquet of the Nobel Hadith.
“Vic” takes exception to the idea of God helping “those who help themselves.” I don’t think He helps anyone. But if we follow the 11th commandment and smile -even in the face of adversity- we can help ourselves to the God within.
i have much confi. bcz i m good looking and i have 6 ft height i m bearing long clothes and my confide. my personalty it’s my plesur. i m smile much time so i m cool boy.
Cool, nice article. I reached to this site for the first time and I am highly impressed with the posts. Good work, keep it up.
the tips are very useful in gaining self confidence and i feel people do fail in building confidence because they do not revise these. tips. good work
Thanks a lot Owiti, for your comment and appreciation. I am highly delighted that you liked the post.
YUP ALL THESE THINGS ARE REALLY VERY USEFUL..
I HAVE OBSERVED IT RATHER EXPERIENCED IT.
Thanks Anuradha for your comment, I am glad that you liked the article.
I like the valuable info you provide in your articles
Nice work.
Thanks Edward.